what the hell happened?

so i'm sitting here, right now

i'm fully clothed...that's good.

my breath smells of alcohol and korean food

oh

my tongue, i can't feel

both because i scalded it on ridiculously hot soup and because i drank way too much last night

did i mention i still have my jeans on?

and

i just woke up.

my eyeballs hurt...so i must've cried last night.

which translates into krazie being crazy drunk.

my head is a little congested.

i still have all the money in my purse

i remember losing an earring at the hooch.

no problem...they'd find it when the cleaned up

the other should be in my pocket, but it's not.

so i'll be questing to find that amidst the bedsheets

definitely just found the tissue i used last night from said crying.

oh dear

i just sniffled and i thought my head was going to explode

oh thank god

i don't have to work today.

i don't even know how i can type right now.

but these are my first thoughts.  

my alarm must've gone off, but i'm sure i slept right through that piece of crap.

speaking of crap....

i feel like shit.

thank god birthdays come once a year.

sniffled again...same results.

really i just wanna know where my earrings went now.  

oh jesus...

just went potty...washing my hands looked in the mirror.

thank the heavens i slept alone.

and dammit

i got stuff on my new birthday shirt.

hopefully it comes out.

man alive.

i remember having a cake and taking it to the hooch.

WTF happened?

holy carp...

that too, but holy crap.

thank god my fingers work, because brains aren't.

ouch.

i'm done.

Giddy New Single Woman!

While I remain in a stressful place I am not stressed. My cousin said to me the other day, “Tough times never last, tough people do.” And is he so right!

I went out last week with some new friends. It was a group “date” and I was very nervous. I haven’t been nervous when going out with new friends in years! But it was the best time I had since I arrived in Illinois. How interesting it is to be single and “out there” in that scene. In our younger years, it was different to be single and looking for whatever came along. Now that I have gained a few years, I see so much more now.

I played pool – horribly – and hung out. Of course, we were at a sports bar so I wore my awesome NY Yankee jersey. To my delight – and surprise – one gentleman in our group is a die hard cubs fan. What fun it was to NOT be a hater and enjoy the friendly banter of sports talk.

I for course, say thank you to Rockey for “educating” me on sports. We even spoke of the hockey game in October of which the Detroit Red Wings will be coming to St. Louis. That should be an interesting and fun adventure.

Adam, you will be ecstatic to know my new friends are EOD. So, of course, I will be coming to you for words of wisdom and warning. HA!

Two Weeks

Well it's been two weeks.. I am slowly getting back into the swing of life, but I guess that really won't be finished until I Officially sign in at Hurlburt.. This next week Tammy and I are going back to Mass for my sisters wedding then I will report the day after we return.
It's Saturday afternoon here and yes another Bug Shop Saturday gone..It's funny how things contrast each other soo MUCH.. Just a few weeks ago, I was going through the WEEK of LASTs(and firsts..like PUMPKIN DUCK and SUSHI)..But now I go through the weeks remembering what I would have been doing on Wed (free pizza), Thurs(M & M), Fri (free dinner) and then OF COURSE Sat (the Bug Shop) Sun(get ready for another week).. Yea NO there are no M&M nights or free pizza nights but we have Tues & Thurs night football games..
Haven't had ONE bit of Korean Food since I have been home..I thought I would NEVER miss it, but because of YOU, I acutally DO... Beef on a Leaf in the univeristy district, Bulgogi & Yaki on Sundays and of course who could ever forget the VERY first & last time at Pumpkin Duck..
So yes I still KNOW who you all are..I thought since it has been 2 weeks and I haven't added anything on here to see how many times people read it that I would give you a quick T-hoe update..
I am going to attempt to start updating the family blog and I will start right after I POST this..

Keep it real over there..
Always in my heart
J T-hoe

Well Said

Lt, Holy crap! Well said. What a tear jerker. I can't stop reading it. I am very grateful that I've gotten the chance to get to know each and everyone of you. Ya'll are some incredible people!

Peace,
Steve O

WoW.. You've done it again

Thankyou for EVERYTHING all of you..

If the post below this isn't enough clarification for anyone, I think it's PERFECT...OUTSTANDING..not sure how many times I can read tonight but VERY NICE....

THANK YOU AGAIN for being such special people and touching me sooo deeply..
See my other post here ---->  Jason's Jaunt 

Always in my heart and YOUR FRIEND, BROTHER

Jason

And then there were three

Do you cry because it's over?

or

Do you smile because it happened?

Well dammit

I think today

I'm gonna do both

With every hug

memories of the past 

run through my mind

like a flash of lightning

through the night sky

I close my eyes 

and 

there we are

and 

there we were

You'd think with each goodbye

(and there have been a few)

it would get 

easier

because they make us stronger

because we know we are that much closer

to our own goodbyes

i sit here with a strange feeling

the desire to leave so badly

to get back to the "real world"

but this place has this power to pull at my heartstrings

just a little bit

just enough

this place changes people

this place has changed me

my eyes have been opened to some of the most amazing things

and 

it's because of you all

i can see so clearly

i am grateful everyday

for

everything we've shared

everything we've accomplished

as co-workers

as peers

as friends

i count myself lucky

to have had the time

(no matter how brief)

to know each of you

and look forward to the day we meet again

now remains only three

but in the words of someone somewhere

and

(i hope they are right)

the best...

it's yet to be.

peacelovehope to you all

always

there is a puddle in my entryway...

T-hoe...you want to explain that one?

New Honoraries

Last night, the couple of us that are left decided to have an offline discussion and decided that maybe we should have done this earlier but after NOT MUCH debate and or DISCUSSION it was very easy to see that these two personnel should be HONORARY C..K..G members...

So Adam Ginett  & Ben Carlson  you my friends are now  (H)C..K..G

Thank you

So.. I know I already said MOST of what I needed in my last post...BUT... How do I thank you for this past weekend ????

  I don't have a good answer..We had a great time..You all made this weekend and AWESOME time for the 3 of us...You all got together to make me an AWESOME jersey..and now I am at a loss for words..

  I have soooo much on my mind right now..I have so much I want to say to all of you but it's just a jumbled mess of emotions..  Rockey left last night, Vinny leaves tonight and Leasa, JC, Joe are already gone..I knew I wanted to say some things, I know I wanted to say a HUGE thankyou to all of you on Saturday but I am not sure if any of it came out the way it should have..

  So I will try it again...
1st..Steve O...Like I said before, I wouldn't have wanted to have the cookout ANYWHERE else..Thank you for opening your shop and your heart to all of us..!!
2nd..Vinny & Calvin...Thank you for preparing everything..Thank you both for being YOU...You guys both are awesome
3rd...Rockey..You're probably the FIRST person to notice when I started to loosen up..I am sorry that I didn't get out earlier..
4th..Nicki.. Thank you for everything...for going out of you way to work the logistics for the Jersey..You too are awesome and one of a kind
5th..Leasa, I know you weren't here but WE ALL KNEW you were here in spirit...Thank you for being a great friend..GOOD luck in your every new step and adventure..We are all ALWAYS thinking of you !!
6th...To all of you (the C..K..G)...You may have put FOUNDER on my Jersey, but it wasn't I..We all just kind of JELLED..We all kind of knew how to listen to each other and WE all knew how to make each other LAUGH...and the BEST part is WE all knew, whether it was professional or not, how to assist each other to get things done...What a GREAT team !!...

 So now I am left with my last thought..I never like to feel like I OWE people anything and that is not where I am going.. I wanted you all to have a FD coin, but there were none... I wanted you all to have something but I have left you all empty handed. Then I thought..I have a LIFETIME for that BUT..Probably the biggest thing I could have given you all was my TRUE friendship and a funny as some may think (THIS BLOG).. 

 I already miss you all a bunch, but like Rockey said yesterday and this weekend, 

IT's TIME TO GO HOME...

Remember you ALL have a place with T-hoe anytime..